U-TURN by Bruce Grierson

I first became aware of this book just before the arrival one year of Yom Kipur, Judaism’s most holy day.  As a Rabbi, part of my job is to prepare a (hopefully) inspiring sermon for this day, usually on the topic of change and self-improvement. It was for this reason that when I heard about this book – and read its subtitle “What if you woke up one morning and realized you were living the wrong life?” – I instantly knew I had to read it as part of my preparation for Yom Kipur.  The problem was, since I was in Israel, there would not be enough time for me to order – and receive -- the book from America before the holiday.  So, I put out public request: Is anyone currently in America planning on visiting Israel in the next week? If so, could I order a copy to your US address, and then you bring it with you on your visit.  To save time, I didn’t mention I needed the book for sermon preparation, but simply needed it as soon as possible. 

One of my friends misunderstood my ‘crying’ out in need and wrote a note back full of compassion: “Dear Ian, please stay strong.  You may feel like your life is meandering without meaning and you’re going in the wrong direction, but there are many people who love and support you.  We believe in you!  You’re not on the wrong path.”

My friend’s misplaced concern notwithstanding – hey, I responded, I think I’m doing just fine, thank you very much – the book turned out to be a wonderful read about how we all can improve, even if we’re already on the right path more or less.

At its core, it’s an exploration of over 300 stories of u-turners, gripping tales of people who have risked everything to answer life’s wake-up call: people who change political parties and careers, people give up their jobs as doctors to become poets, professional athletes who quit to spend more time with their families, mothers who quit their families to pursue careers, people who suddenly become revolutionaries for a cause they didn’t care about the day before.  The focus is not so much as to the quality of the u-turn, of whether or not the radical change in one’s life was good or bad.  Rather, the book asks why some people make ‘U-turns’ in their lives, while others – seemingly with the same input – choose to stay the course of their current lives.  Why was Pat Tillman inspired to abandon a successful football career and join the army after 9/11 (a decision for which he shortly paid for with his life), while the rest of his NFL colleagues continued with business as usual?  Or speaking of business, why was Jean Henri Dunant, a successful Swiss businessman, so moved by a battle he accidentally witnessed on his way to make a profitable licensing agreement that he chose to leave his business behind and start the Red Cross?  Or, in one my favorite examples, why did half the astronauts on (5 out 6) Apollo missions visiting the moon become inspired to have spiritual epiphanies, claiming they felt God’s presence and heard His voice, and then returned to Earth with different priorities, many retiring from NASA to become spiritual leaders, artists, writers?  Yet the other half returned much the same as when they left?

Grierson examines the u-turn of these 300 people from all angles – philosophical, scientific, literary and psychological.  He elucidates what type of person perceives the need to change (a small percentage of the population).  As well as what type of person, upon perceiving the world differently, actually has the courage to act on that perception (even smaller).  And then, what kind of person is willing to go all the way with this courage to completely transform his or her life (nearly miniscule, he notes, since most people, thanks to cognitive dissonance, will more quickly abandon the evidence advocating for a transformation than their comfortable lives). 

He also explores what type of external factors are likely to play a role.  In one study he quotes, for example, he emphasizes the influence of other people on those undergoing conversions.  “The discovery of a new truth was indistinguishable from a discovery of a new relationship, which relieved, at least temporarily the upheaval of a previous life.”  Others note the importance of one’s environment, as indicated by psychologist Philip Zimbardo’s line “You can’t be a sweet cucumber in a vinegar barrel.” He explores many other influences as well.

And while I’d love to share more examples – like Ghandi, Martin Luther, and the swapping of political leanings of Ronald Reagan and Gore Vidal – as well as the details the author illuminates in each of these conversions, I’m running out my self-imposed rule to keep these posts relatively short.  I will conclude, therefore, with a general observation.  Grierson traces the meaning of the word conversion back to its Greek roots, where it has several connotations: To turn around, as in turning one’s entire body around so his back is now facing someone (and indeed, the u-turns he describes often include painful abandonments of loved ones); to turn from ignorance to knowledge; for a ship to turn on a new track once the captain suddenly realizes he’s made a terrible mistake; and my favorite: to turn again, suggesting there is return involved, to do something previously performed but this time, getting it right.

If you found yourself considering a major change in your life, would you find it terrifying ... or liberating?

***

If you've enjoyed this content, consider signing up to receive ALL BOOKED UP directly to your e-mail.